I meant to send out a newsletter last week. And I meant to post on Instagram more than zero times over the past two weeks. I meant to respond to work emails. And, I meant to send a few emails to relatives. 

Instead, about ten days ago I slipped on ice, fell entirely on my head, and ended up in the ER. I have a concussion (I got a concussion? I had a concussion? I’m not actually sure how the grammar works here). Anyway, I’ve been on forced rest time, or, as the ER doctor explained it, “clean living”. During this time I am supposed to stay away from screens (which is incredibly challenging even when you’re really really trying, so I think we might all be doomed there), avoid alcohol, sweets, and fried foods (perfect for holiday eating), do a lot of “resting”, and drink lots of water. Reading is okay, except that sometimes it isn’t. Exercise is okay, except sometimes it isn’t. Me being me, I assumed that I’d lay low for a few days and pop back better than ever.

Instead, it is over a week in and I’m still not doing great. My brain is definitely working now (yay!), but I tire easily, and am still feeling the need to take a lot of physical and mental breaks throughout the day. As much as I’d like to be kicking off the year with a bang -- announcing some new things in the works over in Verdi land and recording loads of new podcast episodes --  I’m finding myself forced to keep that quiet. Instead, I’m working on being incredibly kind to myself. I’m journaling, I’m listening to music and audiobooks, I’ve started meditating again. I am seeing clients this week and am really excited for that, but I’m not doing any of the other things that typically make up my workload. I’ll still be taking on new clients this month, but I’m limiting the number of sessions I do per day to make sure that I don’t go overboard. My husband has and will be continuing to take on more and more parent duties as well as more and more Verdi operations duties. I don’t think I’ll be on Instagram much. 

At the moment, while I type this on my laptop with all the blue light removed (it is very orange!) and have a timer set so that I don’t spend more than 20 minutes total on a screen, I feel somewhat hopeful about what the next month will bring. 

Ben (the aforementioned husband and business partner) has been slowly taking on more roles over here at Verdi land and we now are in a position where I’m forced to hand more over. I’m not sure if this will be a surprise or not, but I’m rather a type A personality and the process of handing things over has been hard for me, even though I know it is a good idea. This forced process might be good. I don’t have a choice, and that’s likely a good thing. 

And, again with that Type A personality thing, I’m not great at slowing down in general. I have a hard time not making lists, not constantly trying to improve processes (even ones as mundane as my post-shower skincare and teeth cleaning routine), not chilling out. Now I don’t have a choice. And, as of now, I’m feeling kind of grateful for that lack of choice. 

I’m also feeling grateful for the clients I have and the new ones coming on board. I’m grateful that I’m getting the opportunity to do only the work that I’m best at -- only the client facing work (and writing this weekly post). I’m grateful that I get to shed the other things and I get to decide how quickly or slowly I take on new folks. For now, I’ll just be taking on 2 new clients this month. That replaces a couple folks who are graduating out so it doesn’t actually increase my capacity. I hope that by this time next month I feel ready to increase that capacity further, but we’ll see. 

As always, I’m rooting for you. 

XOXO,

Which makes me wonder…what else can I try out? 

My kids started at a new preschool in mid August. They had spent the last 5 months with a wonderful nanny and before then had been at a different daycare. Having the nanny cost more than the previous daycare and their current school is almost exactly the same cost as the nanny, so my finances haven’t changed much. 

What has changed is my schedule and routines. The actual time that kids are being taken care of has barely changed -- the nanny worked 9-4 and would be flexible to stay a little later or come a little earlier if a need arose (i.e. early morning doctor’s appointment or client session that ended right at 4). Now the kids get dropped off at 8:45 and picked up between 4-4:30. Almost identical to the previous schedule, right??

Wrong!

My husband and I both work from home -- I work in a home office on the second floor which is right next to the kids’ bedrooms and my husband works out of a workshop in the backyard which, importantly, does not have a bathroom or running water (it does have electricity and AC, however). What this meant in reality when we had the nanny was that we were both trapped for good portions of the day. We didn’t want the kids to see us and then get thrown off of their regular routines and so we hid away. This meant I didn’t get nearly as much midday movement in my life, which has always been a really important factor in my productivity and neither my husband nor I drank enough water or ate reasonable meals on a lot of days. Granted, the nanny always took the kids out for a morning activity, but that wasn’t the time period that seemed most important for us to be able to leave our respective offices. 

Okay, now I’m just rambling. 

The point is that all of a sudden we have our house fully back! And, let me tell you, it is marvelous. I made a wonderful lunch yesterday AND ATE IT AT THE DINING ROOM TABLE. A luxury! 

Sometimes when I’m feeling stuck in a client challenge I putz around the first floor and walk up and down the stairs to clear my head. Incredible!

My husband regularly drinks water and eats food. A HUGE win! 

And how, praytell, does this relate to money you ask? 

Well, in a roundabout way it is entirely linked. Sometimes the options you have aren’t really about money, they’re about lifestyle or values. And, sometimes, you don’t really know what you’re missing until you’ve tried both options. We absolutely adored our nanny. She is still an important part of our lives and I wouldn’t have traded that time for the world. AND the changes in my day to day when my kids are fully out of the house are priceless to me. 

Sometimes it is easy to try both ways -- you can absolutely get one kind of milk at the store one week and try the other kind you’re interested in the following week. But, more often than not it is hard to try it both ways. You can’t buy two homes (probably) in two locations to see which one you like better, but you can rent an Airbnb for a few days to check out a different neighborhood. You can’t commit to a nanny and a preschool at the same time and decide which one you like better, but you probably can try out a full-day babysitter for a day or two to test the waters. 

If you’re struggling with an “either or” financial decision I highly recommend taking the time to brainstorm ways of recreating the scenarios so you can see how they feel before making a decision. Who knows, maybe you’ll realize you can pee in the middle of the day without fear of upsetting the delicate balance of your 18 month and 3 year old’s dynamic! And, let me tell you, that’s a miracle. 

As always, I’m rooting for you.

XOXO,

We do these Day in the Life of my Wallet posts on instagram pretty regularly and they’re always popular. I think people like them because as a society we rarely talk about money or spending and we definitely don’t tell people the exact amounts we spend. Here at Verdi we are working on breaking down those taboos one super vulnerable moment at a time.  

So, here goes my first DITLOMW (woof, that’s a mouthful) via newsletter! I chose a weekend day because it was more exciting. Yesterday’s was verrryyy boring. A whole lotta $0s. 

May 2, 2021

$7 - cupcakes at the Montrose Farmers Market. Yum!

$29.73 - kiddo books from Once Upon A Time Bookstore. We love reading to little Vidalia and the usual rotation was feeling stale. Got a few new ones, including “The Hungry Hungry Caterpillar” and “No, Not the Armadillo” to spice things up.

$94.85 - Trader Joe’s. Mostly reasonable groceries, but also chocolate babka just because.

$331.79 - Splurge!! New sheets and pillows from The Company Store. All on sale and I’m SO EXCITED. There is nothing like crawling into a wonderful, perfectly comfy bed.  

$463.37 - Grand Total

XOXO